Gentle Until it is Time for Food : A Call to Civility at Ghanaian Social Gatherings
Dear Nyaaba,
There is a peculiar affliction that has crept into the social fabric of Ghanaian gatherings, transforming otherwise genteel crowds into unruly mobs at the mere announcement of food. Weddings, funerals, parties, and even solemn church events have become stages for this peculiar theatre of chaos, where grace and decorum are unceremoniously shoved aside. It is as though the presence of a buffet line releases a latent savagery that had been carefully hidden behind bright smiles, flowing kente, kabas, and resplendent smocks.
We Ghanaians pride ourselves on being a warm and hospitable people. But what good is hospitality if it is drowned in the unseemly rush for jollof and chicken wings? What dignity remains in a man, once composed and articulate, elbowing his neighbor like a boxer in the ring just to secure the last ladle of soup?
This behavior is not just about hunger or poor planning at events. It is symptomatic of a larger societal issue: the unwillingness to wait one’s turn and the deeply ingrained fear of scarcity. For many, the scramble for food is fueled by the mentality that “if I don’t get it now, there’ll be nothing left for me.” But must we continue to wear this desperation like a badge of dishonor in the 21st century?
This attitude pervades other aspects of our society as well, from traffic jams to public services, where civility is abandoned in favor of the loudest voice or the pushiest attitude. It is time we admit that our social gatherings merely amplify this dysfunction.
Some blame event organizers for failing to plan adequately for the crowd. Others point fingers at the attendees themselves for lacking basic discipline. Both are culpable. Event hosts must understand the importance of order and proper arrangements, including enough food for everyone and a structured serving system. Guests, on the other hand, must act like the cultured people we claim to be, waiting patiently rather than channeling their inner warriors at the sight of disposable plates.
What makes this phenomenon even more appalling is its universality. It does not matter if the gathering is in a wealthy neighborhood or a modest village. The stampede for food cuts across all social classes, revealing that the problem is cultural rather than economic.
This nonsense must stop, and it begins with each of us. The next time you find yourself at an event, resist the urge to rush. Trust that there will be enough food, and if there isn’t, take solace in the fact that no one has ever died from missing out on an extra serving of fried rice.
Event organizers must also do better. Introduce numbered cards or serve food table by table. Call on volunteers to maintain order, if necessary. Make announcements reminding attendees that the purpose of the gathering is fellowship, not competition.
More importantly, we must tackle the deeper issues of scarcity and entitlement in our society. If we believe in abundance, in fairness, and in the value of patience, these virtues will naturally extend to our social settings.
Our behavior at these gatherings reflects who we are as a nation. A society that cannot line up for food without devolving into chaos cannot expect to achieve order in governance, infrastructure, or justice. We must learn to be as gentle when the food arrives as we were during the opening prayers.
So the next time you’re at a wedding or funeral, remember this: civility costs nothing. And if you find yourself tempted to push or grab, ask yourself, what will they say of you after the plates are cleared?
Let us stop this disgraceful trend and prove, once and for all, that we are as dignified as the rich culture we so proudly claim to embody.
Sincerely yours,
Kasise Ricky Peprah
(The Honourrebel Siriguboy)
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